Life And Its Mysterious Ways
by MsJakePuckerman
Summary: *one shot* Rachel explains her love up until she met her soul mate, Quinn Fabray.


**A/N: While I was writing chapters for my stories, I read this piece that I found by digging through my sister's bag that my sister's girlfriend wrote to her and it's just like very sweet, so I wanted to write it as a Faberry thing, even though I'm a Puckleberry shipper! I hope you guys like this.! **

**Disclaimer: don't own glee!**

(Rachel's POV)

I have lived a life that has nothing special to brag about. As an only child I could not help but learn to keep to myself and trust only myself. I've learnt to become my own friend in my little world.

There have been so many times,incidents,moments,realizations ans situations where I have encountered some difficult feelings, I have come as far as shutting the world out and not having a single friend,it wasn't all that bad,I have had the greatest of times inmy life being alone.

I didn't always enjoy it but when you're alone you don't get hurt,you have no fears because there is nothing but yourself to lose,nothing can really hurt you because no one bothers to talk to you,they rather talk about you.

It is a bit more bearable knowing they are talking about you and not to you,what you don't know can't kill you right?. Wrong,it hurt... I always wondered what they were saying about me,why they even bothered talking about me if they could not even talk to me. I felt alone and the more they spoke about me the lonier I realized that I was.

At a point they all started talking to me,this was another lesson to be learnt. I learnt about fakeness. I recieved so many fake smiles and fake greetings, I would always smile back with the realist smile that I could muster up.

While learning this lesson I changed,but my eyes and smile remained the same. They would not hide as I wanted them to, I had to try harder,so i did what they did,faked it.

it started working,I became perfect at hiding the real smiles,the real emotions in my eyes, I started disliking my own eyes, payed very little attention to them. I was finally gone, buried under all this anger and rejection, it became my home,I felt very safe under all of it. No one could touch me under all that rubble.

It was always like this for me. It was the norm of my life,through my preetens to my teens. Like any other teenage girl I wanted to be loved,have a boyfriend or even simply just a true bestfriend. it didn't happen for me. My friendships never lasted,my happiness never lasted,I developed trust issues amongst many other issues. I was just a sideline,I watched girls in their lovely relationships and friendships,boys with their best pals. EVERYTHING I did not have.

So,I gave in to this life,it made no difference to me,nothing new happened for me in my life,same old same old,till I met a person who changed my life.

The day I met her was not any different to me,not with how it started. I was ordered around like any other day, told where to go, what to do, and what to buy. I was instructed to go to an unusual store,for me, Wallmart. I had always drove past it and had never gone inside it. The first day I was sent there I left in the morning. Too worried that I'd get lost or spend an hour or more loooking forthe place,I wasn't too sure that I remembered where it was. I found the store,when I walked in.

There were customers already there asking the lady and man questions,I suppose about their products. It was only those two people who were working that day,politely put as on that day, a lady and a man that I had never met before. Little did I know...

I remeber looking at them both, I was getting nervous,as always,my heart was beating fast. I was worried,worried about what I was going to say and how i was going to say it. A simple thing as "Hi,I'm looking for bra's" was just so unbearable. I thought the man would help me,but the lady came up to me before he did. She, at first took a good look at me.

She was so beautiful. Long blonde hair with the most beautiful smile and hazel eyes. She was perfect.

I felt shy,embarrassed,insecure,so use to being judged,I thought to myself "Damn ,she must be wondering what the hell, a person like me is doing here wasting her time", so naturally I looked down a bit, the closer she got to me,then I looked up,she looked at me,her smile grew bigger when she looked in my eyes,I swear I blushed at how she was looking at them, she smiled and said, "Hi,how can I help you?".

Now you must know that I have always had a big thing for hazel eyes,regardlesss of who they are on. They just do it for me,they catch my attention within seconds. To me, hazel eyes are so open,so gorgeous and attractive.,they help me relax because it seems as if nothing is hidden due to how light they can be.

So here I am, at this store, looking at this lady with hazel eyes,she is waiting for an answer while I am melting into her eyes. I opened my mouth but nothing came out. Nothing new to me. It always happens, I'm really shy. I looked at her a bit more,then I looked down, built up the biggest courage I could preparing myself to look up again.

All the while she is standing there patiently waiting for an answer with her sweet smile. It was as if she knew how I was,she was patient. I finally told her that I am looking for bra's.

It felt like it took me an hour, I was again shy and embarrassed,this was truly not my thing to do,asking for something so private,that wasn't even for me, it was for my friend. I worried about what she was thinking of me.

She kindly helped me,that day I didn't stay long. When I left the store I felt a little down, I could not stop thinking about her eyes,her smile her warmth.

No one had ever loooked at me the way she did. I returned the next day for a bigger size,this time she spoke to me a bit more and told me she is not really meant to do this, but, she understands, it was like she was trying to keep me there a bit longer,as if every second meant something..

I again left that day, back to my boring life, I got home and told my dads that this lady was really so kind to me letting me swap these bras. My dads suggested that I then go get myself some and try them on maybe they will be good for me. So I went the very next day.

The very next day... I walk into the store and she looks up,sees me and gets this cute smile on her face,I didn't understand. I shyly smiled back feeling so goofy. I struggled to tell her again that I need bras,she let me fit them on this time,at the back of their storeroom.

The man working with her, with a weird mohawk said "Geez,how many bras are you buying?".

I felt so embarrassed but I laughed it off and said softly that these are the last. She came to the till and rang the bras up,she looked at me a bit and said if I could give her my number before hand if they need to be changed in case her boss would show up at the wrong time.

My heart went at it again,I didn't know if I would be ok giving my number out. I felt afraid, I felt like my little shell would be broken into pieces.

I hestitated,I looked down then up,she was still looking at me smiling,so I said yes and wrote it down. Boy did I rush out of there. When I was walking to my car I found the text, I smiled to myself hoping I'd made a new friend.

I sent her a message and she definately didn't take long to reply . It was a short conversation. That night I asked her over, "What do we do now,do I not talk to you again or?",

I won't forget her reply, "You can never have too many friends". That night my life started

I would just like to say some things to her at times, like I am sorry that our relationship that we have now isn't public, because her parents won't approve, because she deserves so much more. I don't ever want to hurt her and I so truly love her.

I am trying by all means to be the best she has ever had and I do apologize for those who make her feel small. It is not how I see her, it is not how I have ever seen her, I love her the way she is.

I did not think I would be with a woman but hey, Life and it's mysterious ways.

**A/N: It's not very long or anything, just a quicky about Rachel explaining on how she met her first love. I hope you guys like it, please don't be harsh on me!**


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